For long-term readers of Career Enlightenment, you may feel uncomfortable at the very personal nature of this post. I am going to reveal to you one of my biggest weaknesses — and biggest frustrations. But in the end, in typical Career Enlightenment fashion, I hope to make a point relevant to your job search.
I coach and present to many engineers. All of them pull their hair out at my spelling mistakes. Yes, my spelling is indeed horrible.
My spelling makes me look like an idiot even though I am not an idiot. It makes me look careless, even though I put many hours of thought into almost everything I do. It makes me seem uncommitted, even though this is simply not the case.
My paradox lies in the fact that I firmly believe appearances are equally as important as substance. And so the very fact of my bad spelling actually goes against one of my core values. This hurts and is a source of personal embarrassment on an almost weekly basis.
Dyslexia Came Early
But I want to point out that the spelling problem is nothing more than a manifestation of something very unique about my brain. This isn’t an “I wish I were unique” thing.
At age 5 I was diagnosed with Dyslexia. I couldn’t read until 5th grade, and then only with the help of a book-on-tape. Until age 10, I reversed my lower case “e”. To describe the experience of getting all these things wrong, imagine wearing a pair of glasses, but instead of clear lenses, they actually make certain things invisible. Like someone put big specks of black ink on them.
The funny thing is that sometimes, the more I try to concentrate or bring my awareness to better spelling, or to correcting number sequences, the more I can’t actually see them.
Growing up, these difficulties caused many childhood problems. Without going into the details, I was often at the back of the class and considered quite stupid by most of my elementary school teachers. Despite my mom’s efforts to have me tutored, challenges at school dominated many of my early memories.
The Grist for the Mill
Because I was unable to understand anything written, I was forced to perceive context based on social factors. I learned early on that most conversations could be understood with just a few simple questions. An internal logic could be extracted. This change in cognitive ability forced me to accept that many of the limiting beliefs in our lives may have once been true, but are no longer relevant. I also learned that in no time, I could draw conclusions about the educational material just as well as someone who had read the book. I kept pace in many class discussions with this skill alone.
This resourcefulness is perhaps one of my biggest assets. I can walk into any new situation and quickly ascertain context and then, thereby, content. This skill has made me quite technically adept and an early adopter of many new applications and tools.
I’ve been told I have an intuition about people. For example, at networking events, I seem to just “know” who I need to meet and introduce myself to. I have great success at finding the “right” people to talk to in a room, because most people I have met have become friends and allies in my life rather than just more business cards for the pile.
These are just a few of the assets that I believe have come from these early experiences.
Join the Club
I believe that Dyslexia and other learning issues have a great deal to do with the rate of neuro development, from childhood to adulthood. This change in cognitive ability has forced me to accept that many of the limiting beliefs in our lives may have once been true, but are no longer relevant.
For example, Math and Language were two areas impossible for me to understand as a child. I took three years of Spanish in high school and never learned a thing.
In rebellion, I decided to join a one-year language intensive program in Kathmandu, Nepal, during my junior year in college.
After a year of home-stay and four hours of language study per day, I was fluent in Tibetan. Despite what the psychologists said — and the difference in age and motivation was perhaps the largest factor. But I proved that my belief, “I’ll never learn another language” needed to be discarded. What other beliefs needed to be discarded?
This is a journey many successful dyslexics have gone through. John Chambers, probably the most influential CEO in the world, cannot read successfully. Anything more than a page gives him a migraine, so the mythology goes. So his executives either send him video or written 1-page briefs. John says his ability to communicate well stems from compensating for so many other things that he couldn’t do well.
Thomas Edison was alleged to have not finished high school. His skill was in organizing teams of engineers.
No, Not That Club!
Ok, I am NOT comparing myself to these icons. The club I’m referring to is just the human club. Everyone has weaknesses, troubles or histories that they wish would go away. Many people are troubled with things about themselves every single day, things beyond their control, which make them feel unworthy.
Even the writing of this small story has taxed everything inside of me to make sure my spelling is okay. And even now, I’m sure I’ve missed errors.
So here is the nugget. Whatever your weakness is, embrace it. Find the lesson in it. Look for the patterns that it has caused in your life and find the blessing those patterns have bestowed upon you.
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p.s. thomas edison had a good reason to invent the light bulb….he was afraid of the dark 🙂 true story
Dyslexia is indeed a challenge. Typically people with D are average to well above average intelligence….Churchill, Thomas Edison, Albert Einstein, George Clooney, JFK, Lara Flynn Boyle, Tom Cruise, Orlando Bloom, Muhammed Ali, Billy Blanks, these are some examples of people with dyslexia. Churchill stated school was a nightmare for him. He was humiliated by his inability to read and write. I guess no one was laughing when he made prime minister of England and helped to yank the rug from under Hitler.
Joshua,
Thank you for sharing your story. My sister struggled with Dyslexia as a child and got married has raised 5 boys and lives 10 minutes from my house. Appreciated your transparency and honesty. Welcome to the Human Race! We appreciate YOU!
the struggle of dyslexics, especially in childhood when classmates don’t understand what is going on, is heart-breaking. however it can be a gift. now that technology is becoming more prevalent than ever it appears that many dyslexics are finding their niche there….it makes sense. sound and vision. 2 things dyslexics are very good at in a more abstract, techno way than 2-dimensional text.
i’m completing my masters degree at the university of toronto and have made a website to support my studies (in spite of using no capital letters in this whole comment).
if you’re interested here is the URL:
http://www.wix.com/lisalahey/discoverdyslexia
Joshua – what an amazing adventure you have endured and one which you have gracefully overcome under the circumstances, with much success and a sense of generosity, myself being a recipient of your gifts. You humble us with your positive attitude, creativity and tenacity. Onward and upward!
Orietta, Thanks so much for your kind words. I’ve been so happy with all the support and kindness I’ve received after having revealed this story on the blog. I was very hesitant to share it because it seemed a bit off topic, after all, my readers need jobs. But in retrospect, I’m glad I published it. It’s the stories in our lives that give it spice.
Joshua – what an amazing adventure you have endured and one which you have gracefully overcome under the circumstances, with much success and a sense of generosity, myself being a recipient of your gifts. You humble us with your positive attitude, creativity and tenacity. Onward and upward!
Orietta, Thanks so much for your kind words. I’ve been so happy with all the support and kindness I’ve received after having revealed this story on the blog. I was very hesitant to share it because it seemed a bit off topic, after all, my readers need jobs. But in retrospect, I’m glad I published it. It’s the stories in our lives that give it spice.
Rob,
I relate to that tenacious feeling after being told you can’t do certain things. You’ve been my earliest supporter and I always look forward to learning more about you.
I think you have a book inside you!
-Joshua
Rob,
I relate to that tenacious feeling after being told you can’t do certain things. You’ve been my earliest supporter and I always look forward to learning more about you.
I think you have a book inside you!
-Joshua
Josh:
welcome to the tell all club.
I am both dyslexic and ADHD. But when I was growing up these issues were not well understood – luckily I had a pediatrician that had some inkling and he used an eye patch to correct some of the problem (another long story).
When I was in elementary school – teachers said I would never graduate from high school – I now have three masters degrees (now I am inclined to think that they were all a waste of time particularly from a career point of view). The off shoot of all this is that as a result of the many issues (I also had serious eye problems as well) — I have become vary tenacious, in fact too tenacious perhaps, I am also very focused on detail (great but too slow for most purposes).
None of this keep me out of Vietnam – I ended up an army captain and forward observer. I survived this but it was a terrible fit in terms of a duty assignment. Moral, society has no problem using the afflicted for the negative but uses the affliction to discriminate access to positive outcomes (there are exception like Chambers, but they are few – and most have had exceptional luck and a ton of other things in their favor).
Which brings me to another point – I am a survivor! Frankly I could go on-and-on on this thread, but I will spare you all.
I may be a survivor up to this point and can look back on life and say it has been okay – not great. I am not sure what is coming from here forward, but the options are not great either – for reasons other than those mentioned above.
All the philosophizing and great success stories in the world are really no consolation – society really doesn’t give a … about this stuff – it is only lip service like a lot of other noble things that are … hum. I would not wish these issues on anyone, so much so, that I have avoided having offspring (bad genetics in place here). I have suffered greatly and would not wish these afflictions on anyone.
An eastern perspective – Buddha peg the source of misery to human desire. Some desire is created by humans and some is the result of structural issues with reality – if you can help folks avoid misery either by avoiding the causes or the reaction to the situation – do so. I have not avoided the misery altogether but I feel fortunate – it has not has been as bad as it could be – so far. The secret is to count ones blessings and keep a positive outlook – be very tenacious in this regard and you will survive.
Cheers
Rob
Josh:
welcome to the tell all club.
I am both dyslexic and ADHD. But when I was growing up these issues were not well understood – luckily I had a pediatrician that had some inkling and he used an eye patch to correct some of the problem (another long story).
When I was in elementary school – teachers said I would never graduate from high school – I now have three masters degrees (now I am inclined to think that they were all a waste of time particularly from a career point of view). The off shoot of all this is that as a result of the many issues (I also had serious eye problems as well) — I have become vary tenacious, in fact too tenacious perhaps, I am also very focused on detail (great but too slow for most purposes).
None of this keep me out of Vietnam – I ended up an army captain and forward observer. I survived this but it was a terrible fit in terms of a duty assignment. Moral, society has no problem using the afflicted for the negative but uses the affliction to discriminate access to positive outcomes (there are exception like Chambers, but they are few – and most have had exceptional luck and a ton of other things in their favor).
Which brings me to another point – I am a survivor! Frankly I could go on-and-on on this thread, but I will spare you all.
I may be a survivor up to this point and can look back on life and say it has been okay – not great. I am not sure what is coming from here forward, but the options are not great either – for reasons other than those mentioned above.
All the philosophizing and great success stories in the world are really no consolation – society really doesn’t give a … about this stuff – it is only lip service like a lot of other noble things that are … hum. I would not wish these issues on anyone, so much so, that I have avoided having offspring (bad genetics in place here). I have suffered greatly and would not wish these afflictions on anyone.
An eastern perspective – Buddha peg the source of misery to human desire. Some desire is created by humans and some is the result of structural issues with reality – if you can help folks avoid misery either by avoiding the causes or the reaction to the situation – do so. I have not avoided the misery altogether but I feel fortunate – it has not has been as bad as it could be – so far. The secret is to count ones blessings and keep a positive outlook – be very tenacious in this regard and you will survive.
Cheers
Rob
Joshua,
This is the best piece you have ever written. I admit that at times your natural gifts with technology have frustrated me because I felt inadequate and slow to learn. I’m sure some of your other students also thought learning must just be easy for you. Ha! Little did we know.
Thank you for letting this wall down so I can see you as the human you really are – a deeply dedicated and caring person who turns struggles into successes. I realize my journalism background makes me criticize people’s writing – and I should focus on their point, not their spelling.
Joshua,
This is the best piece you have ever written. I admit that at times your natural gifts with technology have frustrated me because I felt inadequate and slow to learn. I’m sure some of your other students also thought learning must just be easy for you. Ha! Little did we know.
Thank you for letting this wall down so I can see you as the human you really are – a deeply dedicated and caring person who turns struggles into successes. I realize my journalism background makes me criticize people’s writing – and I should focus on their point, not their spelling.
Your narrative is powerful, persuasive, and personal.
Proud to be a member of your tribe.
Stephen Q – Your advocate based in Delray Beach FL
Your narrative is powerful, persuasive, and personal.
Proud to be a member of your tribe.
Stephen Q – Your advocate based in Delray Beach FL
Joshua, thank you for sharing a very inspiring story of overcoming adversity. You are absolutely right – everybody faces adversity and obstacles. Determined and focused effort can overcome most of them. Don’t let them stop you from pursuing your dreams. And remember, keep your eye on your final objective, not the path you think is required to get there. Sometimes it’s easier to go around obstacles than to move them or climb over them.
.-= Mike Stankavich´s last blog ..Jack of All Trades, Master of None? =-.
Joshua, thank you for sharing a very inspiring story of overcoming adversity. You are absolutely right – everybody faces adversity and obstacles. Determined and focused effort can overcome most of them. Don’t let them stop you from pursuing your dreams. And remember, keep your eye on your final objective, not the path you think is required to get there. Sometimes it’s easier to go around obstacles than to move them or climb over them.
.-= Mike Stankavich´s last blog ..Jack of All Trades, Master of None? =-.